Not to mention, the skewed way I found out the test results. Not by a phone call from one of my doctors. But rather, by chance, while on my medical chart that is posted online. It was a huge mistake on their end, but it has been apologized for and being resolved. It kind of felt like a punch to the gut, then another and maybe a choke hold too. Not gonna lie, I was pretty rocked. We both were. We have told Meran & Jameson (hardest part) but not Sutton & Bellen. As needed, if needed, we will let them know. Rocked our family for sure.
"Couldn't even pray for myself" rocked... But that's where you ALL came in. Your prayers, interceding for me, for us as a couple, as a family. Thank you isn't enough, but will have to do until I can repay the "pray-vor" (get it, favor + pray = pray-vor ;) lol.
I have metastatic breast cancer, in the pleural fluid and most likely in the lining on the (left) chest wall.
But if there is a bottom line, there must certainly be a top line, right?
If I don't look for the good I will miss the blessings, no doubt, on this journey.
It looks like it was caught early. As in, not having many symptoms, early. So, there is a great possibility that I can have a great many years if we can keep the cancer at bay and from spreading.
For now, the plan is to have PET scan next week to see if the cancer has gone anywhere else (prayer request #1)-that it's only in the current known places
Then I will go on hormone therapy and possibly a clinical trial drug that is looking promising (prayer request #2)-technically I'm not totally legible for the trial for a few reasons so I'd love God to make a way if this is in my best interest.
Seriously, we feel so loved thru everyone's texts, emails and most of all prayers. Several have shared that they have been up at night beseaching God on our behalf. I can't tell you what that means to me. How it lifts my spirit. My dear friend used the analogy today of the story in Mark 2, how the paralyzed man was literally carried to Jesus by his friends to be healed. That is what you are to me, the times I am weary and sad.
I'm a slow reader(or rather never sit down to read), so I'm still trying to get through Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts. Today this jumped out and bit me, snapping me back into "spiritual" reality...
"The secret to joy is to keep seeking God where we doubt He is"
We still believe God performs miracles, because the bible tells us He is the same yesterday, today and forever(Hebrews 13:8)...so we will continue to pray for my complete healing!